Overall rating from 1 to 100: 58
O Masterpiece (95-100)
O Excellent (75-94)
O Rental (60-74)
X OK (50-59)
O Mediocrity (30-49)
O Avoid (1-29)
Review by Jason Pyles / September 28, 2007
If you look on the wrappers of Hershey’s chocolate bars this fall, you’ll see a photo of country music star Brad Paisley. This is a strange sight for me. I grew up in West Virginia and attended John Marshall High School in Glen Dale, which is the same small town where Brad Paisley grew up and the high school he attended.
Though I never knew him, as he is a couple years older than I am, the locals say that he was introverted and quiet. Now he is rich and famous and married to Kimberly Williams, the bride from “Father of the Bride” (1991). Their connection is a remarkable story for another time and another review; faithful readers will encounter it someday.
In April of 2002, Paisley came back to our mutual stomping grounds and played “An Evening Back Home” concert (which was spectacular). I remember, while driving up to the concert, seeing a gigantic stretch limo headed for his parents’ home to pick them up. The capacity crowd in the Wheeling Civic Center roared, cheering for our hometown boy who made it big and become a hero. And he still is.
Similarly, John Farley (Seann William Scott) was a nobody from the small town of Forest Meadow, Nebraska, but he grew up and became the famous, inspirational, self-help book author of “Letting Go: How to Get Past Your Past.”
Apparently, Farley had a lot to let go of. He was traumatized as a middle school kid by an abusively demanding gym teacher, Mr. Woodcock (Billy Bob Thornton), and Farley’s father died leaving him and his widowed mother alone.
Farley is invited to receive the honorable “Corn Cob Key to the City,” so the celebrity writer returns home to a hero’s welcome, much like Braid Paisley. But to his horror, his sweet, single mother (Susan Sarandon) has begun dating the dreaded Mr. Woodcock.
This strain between the positive-thinking, self-help guru and the aggressive, critical Phys. Ed. teacher is the main conflict and supposed source of humor. And, at times, it is somewhat funny. Those times are few.
But as the movie progresses, “Mr. Woodcock” becomes remarkably similar to “Meet the Parents” (2000), especially the Robert DeNiro--Ben Stiller battle. In fact, the big, revelatory blow-up scene from “Meet the Parents” is echoed with precision in “Mr. Woodcock.” That being noted, if you have seen neither movie, “Meet the Parents” is far superior. But in both cases, you have a basically good guy who has everything go wrong for him.
I expected “Mr. Woodcock” to be much worse, as far as lewd content, considering its title and Billy Bob Thornton’s presence (“Bad Santa,” 2003). But surprisingly, it isn’t quite as crude and crass as I had feared, though its PG-13 rating is deserved, every whit.
Overall, “Mr. Woodcock” gains momentum, providing a couple chuckles later in the film, but it’s nothing to write home about. In other words, this movie isn’t going to earn director Craig Gillespie the same kind of warm welcome-home celebration that Brad Paisley receives.
Directed by Craig Gillespie
Billy Bob Thornton / Seann William Scott / Susan Sarandon
87 min. Comedy
MPAA: PG-13 (for crude sexual content, thematic material, language and a mild drug reference)
Copyright 2007. 191
Friday, September 28, 2007
Thursday, September 27, 2007
Eastern Promises (2007)
Overall rating from 1 to 100: 90
O Masterpiece (95-100)
X Excellent (75-94)
O Rental (60-74)
O OK (50-59)
O Mediocrity (30-49)
O Avoid (1-29)
Review by Jason Pyles / September 27, 2007
“Eastern Promises” is an uncomfortably uneasy film. Watching it is like walking through a minefield. This is the kind of movie where you don’t feel safe, even though you know you’re seated in a cushy theater chair.
But don’t misunderstand me: It’s not that “Eastern Promises” is overly suspenseful; that’s not it. The reason this movie is excellent is its characters are so diabolical, we squirm with anxiety about what they might do next. Indeed, there are several loose cannons rolling around on board this ship.
If you’re a Mafia movie fan, as I am, then you’ll be familiar with Joe Pesci’s explosive roles, such as his Tommy DeVito in “Goodfellas” (1990). But “Eastern Promises” has similar (but less flamboyant) nut-jobs who are sleeping tigers, and Naomi Watts’ character repeatedly kicks them.
Anna (Naomi Watts) works in a hospital in London. One of her less fortunate patients has to deliver her baby early, due to hemorrhaging. The tiny child is orphaned at birth. But Anna finds the mother’s diary, which recounts her dark, dreary days. The journal’s contents, written in Russian, are potentially deadly.
Also inhabiting London are some members of the Vory V Zakone (the Russian Mafia). Semyon (Armin Mueller-Stahl) is a wealthy restaurateur with an emotionally unstable son, Kirill (Vincent Cassel, “Ocean’s 12”). They employ the fearsome Siberian named Nikolai (Viggo Mortensen) who coyly claims that’s he’s “just a driver,” but we know (and fear) that he’s so much more.
In true Mafia fashion, these three are capable of anything — especially any unthinkable thing. And Anna, incapable of apathy, insists on having the dangerous diary translated in hopes of finding out whom the baby should belong to.
Now, if you doubt whether Viggo Mortensen could ever pull off “frightening” and a convincing Russian accent, all at the same time, then you’re dead wrong. His performance, mark my words, is Oscar-nomination worthy.
“Eastern Promises” is an exceptional film. It is also gruesome and graphic. This movie isn’t your grandpa’s Mafia, in the vein of the 1930s gangster pictures. “Eastern Promises” has the same grit as a Scorsese film: atmospheric, moody, horrifying and wonderful.
Directed by David Cronenberg
Naomi Watts / Viggo Mortensen / Vincent Cassel
100 min. Thriller / Crime
MPAA: R (for strong brutal and bloody violence, some graphic sexuality, language and nudity)
Copyright 2007. 189
O Masterpiece (95-100)
X Excellent (75-94)
O Rental (60-74)
O OK (50-59)
O Mediocrity (30-49)
O Avoid (1-29)
Review by Jason Pyles / September 27, 2007
“Eastern Promises” is an uncomfortably uneasy film. Watching it is like walking through a minefield. This is the kind of movie where you don’t feel safe, even though you know you’re seated in a cushy theater chair.
But don’t misunderstand me: It’s not that “Eastern Promises” is overly suspenseful; that’s not it. The reason this movie is excellent is its characters are so diabolical, we squirm with anxiety about what they might do next. Indeed, there are several loose cannons rolling around on board this ship.
If you’re a Mafia movie fan, as I am, then you’ll be familiar with Joe Pesci’s explosive roles, such as his Tommy DeVito in “Goodfellas” (1990). But “Eastern Promises” has similar (but less flamboyant) nut-jobs who are sleeping tigers, and Naomi Watts’ character repeatedly kicks them.
Anna (Naomi Watts) works in a hospital in London. One of her less fortunate patients has to deliver her baby early, due to hemorrhaging. The tiny child is orphaned at birth. But Anna finds the mother’s diary, which recounts her dark, dreary days. The journal’s contents, written in Russian, are potentially deadly.
Also inhabiting London are some members of the Vory V Zakone (the Russian Mafia). Semyon (Armin Mueller-Stahl) is a wealthy restaurateur with an emotionally unstable son, Kirill (Vincent Cassel, “Ocean’s 12”). They employ the fearsome Siberian named Nikolai (Viggo Mortensen) who coyly claims that’s he’s “just a driver,” but we know (and fear) that he’s so much more.
In true Mafia fashion, these three are capable of anything — especially any unthinkable thing. And Anna, incapable of apathy, insists on having the dangerous diary translated in hopes of finding out whom the baby should belong to.
Now, if you doubt whether Viggo Mortensen could ever pull off “frightening” and a convincing Russian accent, all at the same time, then you’re dead wrong. His performance, mark my words, is Oscar-nomination worthy.
“Eastern Promises” is an exceptional film. It is also gruesome and graphic. This movie isn’t your grandpa’s Mafia, in the vein of the 1930s gangster pictures. “Eastern Promises” has the same grit as a Scorsese film: atmospheric, moody, horrifying and wonderful.
Directed by David Cronenberg
Naomi Watts / Viggo Mortensen / Vincent Cassel
100 min. Thriller / Crime
MPAA: R (for strong brutal and bloody violence, some graphic sexuality, language and nudity)
Copyright 2007. 189
The Brave One (2007)
Overall rating from 1 to 100: 75
O Masterpiece (95-100)
X Excellent (75-94)
O Rental (60-74)
O OK (50-59)
O Mediocrity (30-49)
O Avoid (1-29)
Review by Jason Pyles / September 27, 2007
Not to be confused with the 1957 film called "The Brave One," which is about a Mexican boy and his bull, this brave one essentially refers to a female superhero (minus the super powers), much like Batman, who becomes a vigilante by taking the law into her own hands. And just like many other superhero stories, the villains create their monstrous tormentor.
And though it has been getting mixed reviews, this critic is here to tell you that this flick "delivers the goods," which is to say, it gives us exactly what we want. Without question, "The Brave One" manipulates us with Hollywood conventions and unlikely occurrences, but it's a good time nonetheless.
I noted that Jodie Foster's character, Erica Bain, evokes the same torn feelings within us that Michael Douglas' William Foster makes us feel in "Falling Down" (1993), another vigilante flick where a regular person goes berserk, lashing out at the evil people of the world. At first, we enjoy this to the point of amusement. But as the afflicted one spins out of control, we begin to cringe and grow concerned.
Erica Bain walks the city with a microphone, recording its organic and inorganic, auditory wonders. She uses these recordings as the ambient backdrop for her radio talk show, "Streetwalk." Bain is deeply in love and unofficially engaged to David (Naveen Andrews, "L O S T"). The wedding invitations have already been ordered.
One fateful night, the two inexplicably enjoy a streetwalk through Central park … again, at night. They are attacked and while she is merely brutally beaten, David is killed. Be warned, this scene is terribly unsettling, especially if you're the type of viewers who identifies with the characters.
As she recovers weeks later, still sore with fear, she purchases a gun and learns how to use it. The rest of the movie depicts Bain's bitterness, enjoyment and guilt while she administers swift justice to the scum of New York. One of the film's great strength's is Bain's initial weakness: She isn't automatically a Rambo; instead, she is awkward, unsure and fumbling while mastering her firearm.
"Disturbing" movies used to be my favorite kind of films. But the older I get, the harder they are to take. "The Brave One" is remarkably relentless and fairly graphic, particularly the upsetting attack scene that serves as the inciting incident.
Interestingly, to help us maintain our support of Erica's onslaught, the filmmakers give us repeated, brief flashbacks to that horrid event, so we can stay angry and justify her actions, a theme that's reinforced and carried throughout the film.
Despite the contrivance, "The Brave One" is solid, if some suspension of disbelief is allowed. We see other recurring themes, too, such as dominant female characters, various forms of recording the events of the city and the moral wrestle between doing what's right and doing what needs to be done.
Directed by Neil Jordan
Jodie Foster / Terrence Howard / Naveen Andrews
119 min. Drama / Thriller
MPAA: R (for strong violence, language and some sexuality)
Copyright 2007. 191
O Masterpiece (95-100)
X Excellent (75-94)
O Rental (60-74)
O OK (50-59)
O Mediocrity (30-49)
O Avoid (1-29)
Review by Jason Pyles / September 27, 2007
Not to be confused with the 1957 film called "The Brave One," which is about a Mexican boy and his bull, this brave one essentially refers to a female superhero (minus the super powers), much like Batman, who becomes a vigilante by taking the law into her own hands. And just like many other superhero stories, the villains create their monstrous tormentor.
And though it has been getting mixed reviews, this critic is here to tell you that this flick "delivers the goods," which is to say, it gives us exactly what we want. Without question, "The Brave One" manipulates us with Hollywood conventions and unlikely occurrences, but it's a good time nonetheless.
I noted that Jodie Foster's character, Erica Bain, evokes the same torn feelings within us that Michael Douglas' William Foster makes us feel in "Falling Down" (1993), another vigilante flick where a regular person goes berserk, lashing out at the evil people of the world. At first, we enjoy this to the point of amusement. But as the afflicted one spins out of control, we begin to cringe and grow concerned.
Erica Bain walks the city with a microphone, recording its organic and inorganic, auditory wonders. She uses these recordings as the ambient backdrop for her radio talk show, "Streetwalk." Bain is deeply in love and unofficially engaged to David (Naveen Andrews, "L O S T"). The wedding invitations have already been ordered.
One fateful night, the two inexplicably enjoy a streetwalk through Central park … again, at night. They are attacked and while she is merely brutally beaten, David is killed. Be warned, this scene is terribly unsettling, especially if you're the type of viewers who identifies with the characters.
As she recovers weeks later, still sore with fear, she purchases a gun and learns how to use it. The rest of the movie depicts Bain's bitterness, enjoyment and guilt while she administers swift justice to the scum of New York. One of the film's great strength's is Bain's initial weakness: She isn't automatically a Rambo; instead, she is awkward, unsure and fumbling while mastering her firearm.
"Disturbing" movies used to be my favorite kind of films. But the older I get, the harder they are to take. "The Brave One" is remarkably relentless and fairly graphic, particularly the upsetting attack scene that serves as the inciting incident.
Interestingly, to help us maintain our support of Erica's onslaught, the filmmakers give us repeated, brief flashbacks to that horrid event, so we can stay angry and justify her actions, a theme that's reinforced and carried throughout the film.
Despite the contrivance, "The Brave One" is solid, if some suspension of disbelief is allowed. We see other recurring themes, too, such as dominant female characters, various forms of recording the events of the city and the moral wrestle between doing what's right and doing what needs to be done.
Directed by Neil Jordan
Jodie Foster / Terrence Howard / Naveen Andrews
119 min. Drama / Thriller
MPAA: R (for strong violence, language and some sexuality)
Copyright 2007. 191
D-War (2007)
Overall rating from 1 to 100: 48
O Masterpiece (95-100)
O Excellent (75-94)
O Rental (60-74)
O OK (50-59)
X Mediocrity (30-49)
O Avoid (1-29)
Review by Jason Pyles / September 27, 2007
Back when I played with toys, it was only on rare, brief occasions that I would dump out the entire toy box and mix action figures, battling and blending different worlds. Why were those moments only rare and brief? Because it was just weird, and I knew better.
So I ask, why didn’t Hyung-rae Shim, the writer and director of “D-War,” know better?
“D-War” is a conglomeration of multiple other, much more successful fantasy films, with a comic-book quality plot. Oddly, the story explaining the movie’s events, which is already weak, is weakened further by additional, extensively complicated, uninteresting background elements.
Yes, “D-War” blatantly rips off (and poorly, I might add) so many other movies, I’d rather just plagiarize and copy and paste someone else’s review than revisit it by continuing to tell you about it.
Basically, if you’ve seen the droid-Gungan battle on Naboo in “The Phantom Menace” (1999), then you’ve already seen much of “D-War.” But I’m not talking about mere imitation, I’m speaking of potential copyright infringement. For instance, there are shields in “D-War” that you’ll recognize from “Phantom Menace.” And how about Phantom’s big creatures with big, round things strapped on their backs? “D-War” has those, too.
Do you remember seeing velociraptors in “Jurassic Park” (1993)? Because I remember seeing them in “D-War” (except they had wings). Oh, and remember the red-letter design for the CNN logo? “D-War” has the exact same design for its news station, CGNN. Why not simply use CNN, just as other movies do?
And another thing, let’s decide on a title. Although the IMDb.com lists this movie as “D-War,” the movie’s actual title screen reads: “D-War Dragon Wars.” That’s like writing my name “J-Pyle Jason Pyles”; it’s just redundant and repetitive. ... tee he. (Speaking of repetitive, the trailers make it seem like we will see a variety of beasts, but alas, there are only a few creatures repeatedly shown over and over.)
But, there are lots of martial artists. Yes, we go from a dinosaur-ish movie to a “Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon” (2000) meets “Shogun” (1980) amalgam. These characters don’t really work, either; nor do they fit.
I’ll do my best with the plot (and I’m not making this up): Every 500 years a woman is born with the power to turn a serpent into a dragon. A good serpent called “Imoogi” must unite with “Yuh Yi Joo,” which is something formed in the golden girl’s body, and then the Imoogi snake can turn into a dragon and ascend into heaven. But, there’s an evil serpent called “Buraki,” who has the same goal as Imoogi, but he’s evil. So, the last time the chance came, it didn’t work out. Now, 500 years later, the time has come for this opportunity again. Meanwhile, while these giant serpents try to find the Yuh Yi Joo possessor, they and their cohorts wreak havoc on civilization. I’m pretty sure I got all of that description correct.
I’m being so hard on “D-War” because I believe it could have been much better. Why not just make a movie where, without any explanation, monsters attack cities? That’s what we want to see from a movie like this, not Ryu Hayabusha’s (Ninja Gaiden) dating woes. This movie’s special effects, at times, are marvelous and occasionally rival any big-budget blockbuster’s CGI. The creatures will look convincingly real in one scene, then very crude in the next.
Yeah, I might like this movie if I were still seven years old. But maybe not. After all, I still kept the action figure sets separate during play, even at that age. I suggest that Hyung-rae Shim put all his toys back in the toy box and just focus on choosing one movie title. After that, he can work on writing a good story and screenplay. And if all goes well, then maybe he can play with his dinosaurs or ninjas, but not both.
Directed by Hyung-rae Shim
Jason Behr / Amanda Brooks / Robert Forster
107 min. Fantasy / Action
MPAA: PG-13 (for intense sequences of violence and creature action)
Copyright 2007. 190
O Masterpiece (95-100)
O Excellent (75-94)
O Rental (60-74)
O OK (50-59)
X Mediocrity (30-49)
O Avoid (1-29)
Review by Jason Pyles / September 27, 2007
Back when I played with toys, it was only on rare, brief occasions that I would dump out the entire toy box and mix action figures, battling and blending different worlds. Why were those moments only rare and brief? Because it was just weird, and I knew better.
So I ask, why didn’t Hyung-rae Shim, the writer and director of “D-War,” know better?
“D-War” is a conglomeration of multiple other, much more successful fantasy films, with a comic-book quality plot. Oddly, the story explaining the movie’s events, which is already weak, is weakened further by additional, extensively complicated, uninteresting background elements.
Yes, “D-War” blatantly rips off (and poorly, I might add) so many other movies, I’d rather just plagiarize and copy and paste someone else’s review than revisit it by continuing to tell you about it.
Basically, if you’ve seen the droid-Gungan battle on Naboo in “The Phantom Menace” (1999), then you’ve already seen much of “D-War.” But I’m not talking about mere imitation, I’m speaking of potential copyright infringement. For instance, there are shields in “D-War” that you’ll recognize from “Phantom Menace.” And how about Phantom’s big creatures with big, round things strapped on their backs? “D-War” has those, too.
Do you remember seeing velociraptors in “Jurassic Park” (1993)? Because I remember seeing them in “D-War” (except they had wings). Oh, and remember the red-letter design for the CNN logo? “D-War” has the exact same design for its news station, CGNN. Why not simply use CNN, just as other movies do?
And another thing, let’s decide on a title. Although the IMDb.com lists this movie as “D-War,” the movie’s actual title screen reads: “D-War Dragon Wars.” That’s like writing my name “J-Pyle Jason Pyles”; it’s just redundant and repetitive. ... tee he. (Speaking of repetitive, the trailers make it seem like we will see a variety of beasts, but alas, there are only a few creatures repeatedly shown over and over.)
But, there are lots of martial artists. Yes, we go from a dinosaur-ish movie to a “Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon” (2000) meets “Shogun” (1980) amalgam. These characters don’t really work, either; nor do they fit.
I’ll do my best with the plot (and I’m not making this up): Every 500 years a woman is born with the power to turn a serpent into a dragon. A good serpent called “Imoogi” must unite with “Yuh Yi Joo,” which is something formed in the golden girl’s body, and then the Imoogi snake can turn into a dragon and ascend into heaven. But, there’s an evil serpent called “Buraki,” who has the same goal as Imoogi, but he’s evil. So, the last time the chance came, it didn’t work out. Now, 500 years later, the time has come for this opportunity again. Meanwhile, while these giant serpents try to find the Yuh Yi Joo possessor, they and their cohorts wreak havoc on civilization. I’m pretty sure I got all of that description correct.
I’m being so hard on “D-War” because I believe it could have been much better. Why not just make a movie where, without any explanation, monsters attack cities? That’s what we want to see from a movie like this, not Ryu Hayabusha’s (Ninja Gaiden) dating woes. This movie’s special effects, at times, are marvelous and occasionally rival any big-budget blockbuster’s CGI. The creatures will look convincingly real in one scene, then very crude in the next.
Yeah, I might like this movie if I were still seven years old. But maybe not. After all, I still kept the action figure sets separate during play, even at that age. I suggest that Hyung-rae Shim put all his toys back in the toy box and just focus on choosing one movie title. After that, he can work on writing a good story and screenplay. And if all goes well, then maybe he can play with his dinosaurs or ninjas, but not both.
Directed by Hyung-rae Shim
Jason Behr / Amanda Brooks / Robert Forster
107 min. Fantasy / Action
MPAA: PG-13 (for intense sequences of violence and creature action)
Copyright 2007. 190
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