The Reaping (2007)

Overall Rating From 1 to 100: 55

Directed by Stephen Hopkins
Hilary Swank / Idris Elba / AnnaSophia Robb
96 min. Thriller / Horror
MPAA: R (for violence, disturbing images and some sexuality)

Review by Jason Pyles / April 13, 2007

Never try to make a serious movie where cows suffer unusual fates. People will always think that’s funny. I know I always do. Here are two examples: “Twister” (1996) and “O Brother, Where Art Thou?” (2000). Add “The Reaping” to the list because it also has some unfortunate cows that are hilarious, even though the humor is unintended.

Our diverse actress, Hilary Swank, plays professor Katherine Winter, a skeptic whose job it is to explain away miracles. “The only miracle is that people are still believing,” she says. But the fact of the matter is, she used to be a believer, too. Something has dispelled her faith.

Because of her rationality and scientific expertise, Winter is commissioned to travel to a small, Bible-Belt town full of religious zealots called Haven, La. Three days ago, something weird happened to the water: a two-mile stretch of river turned to blood.

Also, somehow closely related to this mystery is another oddity: A young girl named Loren (AnnaSophia Robb) is accused of killing her brother.

These bizarre events begin Winter’s investigation of what appears to be the unfolding of the 10 Biblical plagues from the Old Testament, found in Exodus. Each of these plagues was done well — except for the cows.

But “The Reaping” doesn’t work because it has some fundamental flaws. First of all, children are not inherently scary — especially pretty, little, blonde-haired girls with blue eyes whom we just saw in “Bridge to Terabithia.” Next, whenever characters clash, it appears as if the filmmakers didn’t know what to do next, so the fight always cuts away to some dreamy vision sequence, rather than seeing the physical battle. And let’s not forget those cows ...

At any given moment during the film, “The Reaping” feels like “Scary Movie 5,” which doesn’t exist yet — but when it does, this movie should be one of its targets.

There is a sad tragedy in this film. The horror story at hand isn’t a very good story. The ending has left many people disgusted by its ridiculousness. But the sad tragedy is that Stephen Hopkins made the wrong film: The real horror story, the truly scary part of the movie is the horrifying tale of what happened to Winter to make her lose her faith. Forget this plague and evil child business, the movie should have been about this incident from the past.

I saw “The Reaping” with one of my best friends, Karl. In the movie’s opening shots, he sarcastically said, “I think digitized birds are my favorite.” But the birds were nothing compared to those kooky, CGI cows. If you must insist on watching “The Reaping,” watch the cows.

O Masterpiece (95-100)
O Excellent (75-94)
O Good video rental (60-74)
X Merely OK (50-59)
O Pure mediocrity (30-49)
O Medusa: don’t watch (1-29)

Copyright 2007.
JP0073 : 444